It's been a while!!!

    Well first off let me say HELLO! LOL And that I am sorry it has been so long since I have been on here and posted anything. I have been super busy with school and it is wearing on me. Now to the good part I am down 2 more pounds, which puts me at 272. I know that is not much improvement. I should be seeing better results, but I haven't been eating like I should and my appetite suppresant is not strong enough to last all day (hence the eating). I can not get the dosage raised until I go in for my next check up, so I am dealing until then. I also have not exercised. I need to get my butt on that treadmill, but I just feel like a cow when I try to walk on it. I know the only way to fix that is get on it but damn it's hard.
    Today was a rough day! I woke up on the wrong side of the bed, but got over it and got my day started. Hell, I even put on make up and dressed decent today lol. Then class drug on and it was awful. Then I realized that my "friend" is only my friend when it is convenient and when no one is looking so to speak. Well honey, let me say this because if you read this you know who you are. I was there when all the ones you are hanging with now were not and I am still here. Just because I'm not perfect and pretty and skinny like them doesn't mean I do not have feelings and that I do not notice that you pretty much ignore me when they are around. I like them and really they are more accepting of me than you in my eyes. Okay! So that was my rant about that!
    But that was not the end of my day, after everyone got home tonight we decided to go get something to eat. Well here we go over to this little resturant and I am being looked at like I am a fat cow. That was the first time I ever noticed anyone staring at me eating like I had a sign on me that said stare at this cow while she eats and maybe it will stop. I wanted to cry, yell, and become invisible all at once. It was the worst feeling I have had in a long time. It was more than one table / group too. And none of them were really thin either, I have no room to judge but they made me feel like shit. I knew in that moment that I have let it go too far. I am so ready for this change!!!
    Well this is it for the night! I am sure that I will be posting more often like I did the first week. It makes me feel better and makes me accountable and I need that. Good night everyone!!!